belletammy

I once read a piece titled ‘The Writers Curse’. That curse is exactly what controls me right now, I sit here not sure where I am going with what I write but I am compelled to write, and write I will do... Chinyere and Tobi were best of friends, they had grown up together and despite being girls, they never had 'trouble' living together. These two had to move in with Nkiru, another friend of theirs who was the sweetest person, a doting mother hen as Tobi always teased. Unnecessary issues as Nkiru called them seemed to come up every day at work. Having a boss who didn’t appreciate a ‘small girl’ (as he liked to say) standing up to him was not the easiest task. He seemed to make extra efforts to find faults in everything she did. Being human, the pressure began to get to her but the mistake she made was bottle it all up.

Ok, I think I have been silent long enough. . . Nigeria marked the 52 nd year of being independent from the British rule on October 1 st but obviously as the number of years increase, the state of the nation keeps deteriorating. It’s shameful, it’s sad! Nigeria the once fertile land is fast being destroyed. We once were referred to as the giant of Africa but today, we are the sleeping giant. The independence celebration has always been a celebration for all but this year, the president took it to the Aso villa where access is definitely restricted, that's a first and hoping it will be the last. The opposing political party to the president’s political party put it that “the president took the celebration to his bedroom”. The same party has described the president as “a president on internship”. 

Beautifully created, moulded bit by bit. The strength inbuilt but the fragility reflects when looked upon, radiance and gloom all in one. Multifunctional but made to complete. Curves that work up a million images in the mind but at the same time could be an instant turn off. Every part has a uniqueness about it…soft, supple, beautiful, an assignment for the mind to solve. Made up of qualities that form good or bad…Beauty they say lies in the eyes of the beholder but beauty to some lies at face value. Hands of steel, hearts of gold define many…naturally caring and gentle, traits present from the very beginning. On the flip side, cunning, seductive, evil, mean… a side shown especially when scorned. Hurt and bitterness could easily be held onto but in all, easy to forgive is another trait that covers these.

Tony walked to the ATM with such heaviness of heart because he was about to empty his account. Notwithstanding, he went ahead as there was a basic need. As the notes came out, he wondered why he was so broke but then, the year so far had been one full one. Most challenging yet rewarding, the kind of projects he had carried out, he never thought he would. At the same time, he had been broke a few times but this broke? No! The thought terrified him but his comfort was something he heard recently and chose to apply at the moment...’this is the poorest you’ll ever be’. A smile broke out and with satisfaction he got into his car and drove off. Who would see such a good looking lad and know the kind of challenges he could be facing.

From a distance where I sat, I watched as this child continually threw a tantrum and his mother acted helpless and gave into every whim of her child. All he wanted was to have his way and by simply looking, it was rather obvious that he was a handful. I felt for her but at the same time, whose job is it to instill some discipline in him? Reminded me instantly of another child I saw at a mall who almost gave her mother a heart attack simply because she wouldn’t listen nor stay in one place. That’s almost common pIace right?   On the other hand, there was a beautiful girl, dressed like a doll, looking all glamorous…judging from her looks, the first thought could be…”she is so spoilt” but to my surprise she looked right into my face while she passed and greeted. Since she seemed interested in chatting, her mum had a seat and we all had an interesting chat. She would apologize and say thank you at every instance. Her mum had to remind her not to apologize when it isn’t needed. As sma

From the tender age of their teens, he had his eyes on her…but flee was all she did, his name was one around and hurt she feared. Years passed same way he would come and go. They both led their lives oblivious of any connection. Away they both went with the wind but things didn’t work out both ways and back in each others way they were thrust once again. Plan B she cannot accept to be, she was there the whole time but right past he walked and made a choice. True he claims to be but slighted is all she feels. Black or white it has to be, shades of gray are not good enough. Unspoken words, unanswered questions linger but intimidated by her outspoken nature he remains and proper communication eludes them. Hurt her eventually he did but a future together he wants despite all. Bringing herself to accept that and trust him again she cannot do just yet…Trust has to be earned and that much she expects of him. Left off trails…hoping to pick up from where it stopped is all he ac

I had taken being Nigerian for granted all my life. Being at home, there is almost no reason to wear your nationality, that’s all one knows how to be anyway. Growing older and being more in touch with the world, it seems to dawn on people that ‘your nationality is your pride’. Visiting different countries especially when family and friends live in such places can be very different from living in them; you are made to feel at home and can be shown around easily. There is a tendency to be shielded from some of the experiences that one gets exposed to while living in the Diaspora.  See my previous post, 'Tales from the Diaspora' With this realization, your nationality is either a blessing or a curse – at least so it seems. I noticed that people of any country living abroad tend to be more nationalist than those at home.       

Has anyone noticed how easily we Nigerians follow the trend of about anything that happens to be in vogue? Not just that, but the tendency to easily abuse things isn't out of place.... Pardon me if you don't share my view but I happened to grow up in the 80's when the world had some sanity in it. A quick look at these and you just might share my view ;) Religion   The two major religions in Nigeria are Christianity and Islam. If you were to take a drive around Nigeria, the number of churches and mosques is alarming. The churches, can be found within every few kilometres, and have all sorts of names, one would think it were a competition. Loud speakers calling for prayers from mosques, prayers and singing from churches, talk about noise as an environmental hazard?! Do not get me wrong, I do not condemn religion but I am sure that even God follows order :-) I found this survey that was done sometime back (2004), I wonder what the results would be today if it were to

Does it pay to be good anymore? A friend of mine blurted that question out while we were having a conversation. We had a very long conversation about life which touched about everything. She had gone through some experiences that were making her question all she was taught and believed in.   I actually took time to reflect on this question: today does it pay to be good? It seems the good people are the bad ones because they refuse to conform and they end up looking imprudent for their actions. On the other hand, so much evil is perpetrated and it is second to normal to be bad. In the society, at work places, corruption is so rampant, in the news there are always evil stories making headlines.

Blazing hot, reflections unbearable to the eyes, that's how hot the sun has been in this part of the world. Luckily, a thick mast of clouds have begun to gather, black and ready to burst, nothing withheld, the downpour came...breeze, coolness, lower temperatures, phew! The sound on the roof, the clean smell everywhere, beautiful green to behold, nature. Its the rainy season :-) I have a free Saturday this weekend, yippee! I literally have my Saturdays dedicated to attending friends’ weddings these days. So many people are getting married. It is a pleasure to witness love expressed by taking the bold step to tie the knot. On the other hand, I also ask myself every now and then, why are there so many divorces today?  Marriage as I have understood from when I was a child is an institution that is meant to last for a life time. So what is it people are doing wrong? Many of our parents have stayed together through thick and thin. They didn’t have as much information an

On one of the mornings I had to rush out earlier than usual (I had to drop my sister off at the park and pick something up before going to work), I left home at 6 A.M, it was still dark, dawn had hardly broken. I drove out of the gate and behold right in front of the neighbour’s house, I saw two children seated outside, a girl and a boy who couldn’t have been more than five or six and three years old respectively. Surprised, I called out to them and asked ‘what are you doing here’ and the girl responded, her voice rough either from lack of enough sleep or being upset at having to wait out there in the dark. ‘We are waiting for our school bus.’ I was stunned, at that time? So many questions ran through my head. I asked another question, ‘where is your mummy’ and she said ‘inside’. I do not mean to be judgmental but I wondered, how cruel could a mother be? What school bus comes to pick children at this time, instantly I looked at my clock and it 6:07A.M.  Lost in my thoughts, m

When we pray sometimes, we expect answers sent to us in a certain way, we pray with a fixed  mindset but it hardly works that way. Sometimes God comes through for us and in ways we don’t expect, it could be better than we thought or it could be painful, really painful. At other times, He may simply be saying not yet or this isn’t for you. But in all, God knows us and wants good for us so He won’t grant us evil to destroy us. We asked anyway, so He answers. There are times I feel like God is so far away from me, but a friend of mine’s status message read a few days ago if God is far, who moved ? He is the same, He hasn’t and will not change but we always do. Now, do I sound like I am preaching? *Laughing to myself *   'Religion' is a sensitive issue and is generally not advised to be discussed in order not to stir up trouble, I am treading carefully and do not intend to offend anyone who reads this. If you have any misgivings about what I have written, please feel free

A bond so strong, the ability to just know, the feeling of insecurity when a lie is told. One ‘simple’ lie could spoil a relationship built over time. Somehow, more lies have to follow to cover up the ‘simple’ one that was told. In relationships of whatever kind, someone once said that when you lie, you lose one thing which you may never get back: integrity . It reduces you in the eyes of the other person especially when it is someone whose opinion matters to you. Sometimes there may be things known all along but you might be waiting to hear it from just one person, giving a last chance to save whatever integrity the person has. A song I like says ‘ you can play on broken strings, you can feel anything that your heart don’t want to feel …’ We can interpret that in many ways but in all, we choose not to let go so many times when need be to our detriment. Letting go is extremely difficult but in doing so, you give a chance for more and maybe better things and people to come in

Do you prefer to watch a movie or surf the internet instead of reading? I asked a few people this question and most of the people I asked prefer a screen to paper. There was a lengthy discussion on this topic which I happened to listen to. The virtual (online) world has such a strong presence and most people have willingly embraced it. Some people tend to be more active in the virtual space especially social media than they are in reality. Their social lives and things happen for them in the virtual space. On the other hand, in reality, some of these people will not participate physically in social activities. During events, take a look around, when people get bored; phones are easy alternatives to get rid of the boredom.

I have had a rather eventful morning so far...  My hair needs some fixing; I called a salon yesterday to book an appointment for this morning. I was sure to ask if they do African hair and all the necessary details and I got an appointment for 9am today. I got myself ready early and left, the place was extremely difficult to find, no one seemed to know the street. I found it eventually, and when I got in and told the lady there that I had an appointment for this morning, she said I was given an appointment for a consultation not for my hair to be made because their normal practice is to have a consultation then determine what needs to be done before they give an appointment for the actual hair do. Huh? I was irritated, I just wanted to get out but she was keen on giving me a lecture about my own hair and how the things needed for my hair are different and bla bla bla. I politely thanked her and left.  There were a few hair salons on my way, I suddenly seemed to be looking for on

I decided to do another Masters progamme which has brought me all the way to Malta. I have got mixed reactions from this statement like...aren't you tired of school? How much knowledge do you want to acquire? I know, I know but what can I say? No knowledge is useless, besides I love this course I am doing which by the way is; Contemporary Diplomacy. This is a truly beautiful place, I love the view from my room. So far, I have not been able to see the city because we have classes from 9 A.M to 9 P.M, it has been an interesting marathon. The time has flown so fast, we have one more day to go. The courses so far have been great, engaging. I wake up these days looking forward to having classes, a sign that I made the right choice.

The best man there is, able to achieve so much yet so human. Before him, I feel like I know nothing, but the beauty of it is that I can express myself just the way it comes. He is able to fill in the gaps where necessary and he helps in every way to refine my thinking. Blessed with intelligence, I never regret a moment talking to him. Completely benevolent, his palms remain wide open for all to freely benefit from. He has nothing to hold back, I have learnt from his actions that by giving you get a thousand fold more. A perfect gentleman who can make you feel as good as you choose to feel. He is a man of integrity...he will not compromise his standards; he works with beautiful professionalism, a true fountain of knowledge... The greatest woman alive: brave, fearless, full of courage and ready to take on the world, nothing can stop her once she sets her mind to achieve something. I have learnt that I can be and achieve anything I want as far as I set my mind to it.  I sh

How has your life changed since the 1st of January someone asked . . . In response, life for everyone has changed in so many ways; we had a gift given to us by our president that day which wasn't well accepted by most of the citizens of our dear country. Plans suddenly changed, people were unable to return to their previous destinations from their holiday points...The subsidy on fuel, the only thing Nigerian citizens enjoyed as an oil producing nation had been taken away with no warning. Rage is what most people feel towards the government at this point. How does inflicting more hardship on citizens bring development when there are no services rendered at all? A country so blessed yet poverty thrives among her citizenry. Rally points agreed on, unions coming together, youth activist movements ready to do their part to demand that the government do what is right by her people. Posts, comments flying all around, with one voice the movements started. There is so much to be said t