Friday, 29 November 2019

A sound mind

Oyine’s head had been throbbing and continually got worse. She didn’t know what a migraine felt like but if this was not one, she didn’t know how else to describe it. She dragged herself out of bed to take some paracetamol and hoped it would calm down, then she could finally get some sleep. She has had these headaches for the last few days and was afraid she was getting dependent on pain killers. At first, she thought it was lack of sleep as she had not been sleeping well.
She lay in bed waiting for sleep, insomnia had become her new reality, which was worrying. She searched her mind for what the problem could be. The only thing that constantly came up was work. She had been over worked, her efforts seemed to be appreciated but that did not change the situation.

Sunday, 24 November 2019

Quinoa and vegetable mix

I hadn't cooked in a while but I've been able to change that recently. I made of mix of quinoa and vegetables. It is so simple to make and you can find all the ingredients easily.
Good food, a book and some juice make up a good weekend ;)

Cooking time : 40 minutes
A lot of this time would go into cleaning and chopping the vegetables.

Wednesday, 6 November 2019

Visiting San Francisco

I flew into Oakland, it is a small airport, although bigger and better functioning than the Abuja airport...I digress! Getting through was super fast especially as things are automated, the immigration process was DIY on a machine, then you get stamped in by an officer. He only asked how long I was staying for, then I was on my way. From the minute I landed to getting through, it probably took 20 minutes as the queue was not long. I picked up my luggage, then got on the Bart (metro) to meet my friend, Manuela, somewhere close to the Embacadero station.

We spent the night then headed off to the National Parks the next day. I wrote about that in my previous post. After we got back, I had 3 more days before my departure and I made good use of them.

We got back to San Francisco on a Saturday. On Sunday, there was an Opera show at golden gate park organised by San Francisco Opera, and it was free of charge. Everyone seemed pleased to be out in the sun. A few of Manuela's friends joined us and it was generally a relaxing day.

Tuesday, 29 October 2019

Yosemite, Kings Canyon & Sequoia National Parks

I visited California in September. Before getting there, my friend Manuela, who knows some of the kind of activities I would like, planned things. We visited three national parks – Yosemite National Park and Kings Canyon and Sequoia National Park. We started with Yosemite.

If nature, outdoors and hiking interest you, this would be something to do in California.
Yosemite National Park is known for its granite rocks, cliffs and waterfalls. The half dome and the El Capitan are two that were referred to frequently. To climb the half dome, a permit is required. That was not on our list, so we did not find out how to get the permit.
The park has a few vista points where everyone could get great views of things from.

Monday, 21 October 2019

Abuja - Kaduna Express way

Get a driver if you don't want to drive. You have a car so why do you keep travelling by public transport?
"You don't get it", she replied, "you don't seem to understand the situation. When these guys see people in private cars on the road, they make them easy targets to kidnap. They kidnap people in public cars as well, but people feel safer to travel in a group".

The state of the road makes things so much easier for these guys. There have been constant speculations that Julius Berger stopped work as necessary payments have not been made. I do not understand why the government awarded a contract for the road to be fixed without making the necessary payments. Part of the express way is closed, forcing cars to drive on the one way double lanes in both directions. The tar got peeled off so the road is in an awful state. The time to make this trip can no longer be estimated especially if one happens to be on the road on a day when there is an accident or incident.
One side of the road is not functional at the moment

Saturday, 5 October 2019


I have no need to care about how I look; how rough my cornrows are, or how oily my face is. There are no mirrors here anyway.

I should not be bothered much about the unsanitary conditions in which I have to live in certain villages, how I dread going around toilets or bathrooms. Who cares about cleanliness anyway.

I am probably worrying too much about a balanced diet looking for fruits and vegetables, when the only thing I find to eat here is meat and carbs. How many can afford to eat anyway.

Wednesday, 21 August 2019

The journey to motherhood 2

If you missed the first part last week, please have a look here

Mrs B.
I am, or should I say, used to be one of those who desired to get pregnant on the wedding night. So two months into my marriage, I was already getting paranoid; sounds funny to me now, as I didn't know I had a bit of a long wait ahead. Six months into my marriage I discovered I was pregnant! You can imagine how ecstatic I was. There was nothing wrong with me after all, my husband was so happy too.
I kept telling myself I'd always heard that you didn't have to see a doctor until you are 3 months pregnant, and so I did not take any form of medication, not even folic acid! Two months into my miracle, I started seeing little stains of blood, I told myself not to worry as I'd also heard that spotting could be normal. However, a sixth sense pestered till I asked a close friend who had had a baby before, she asked what colour the stains were, I said dark red, and she got alarmed and told me not to waste any more time but to see a doctor! I had two scans from two different hospitals. The first said there was no fetal heartbeat. The second said there was after I asked. The doctor was more concerned with showing us the spot that signifies a baby and putting our minds to rest instead of telling us if all was actually well.

Wednesday, 14 August 2019

The journey to motherhood

Ever imagined not being able to conceive as a woman? Especially when the doctors find nothing but ask the woman to just wait. The pressure from society, the looks, the hurtful comments and constant self-blame. The excuses women/men make for partners when they say hurtful things, explanations women give when they should be focusing on themselves? etc.

We are always looking to the next thing. When will you get married? When will you have children? When will the next one come? We normalize pressure and always seem to have an opinion on how things should be. We forget that the person we have an opinion about has feelings just like we do, and it is about their lives, not something abstract. I remember talking to one of my friends in her third year of waiting to conceive. I remember the despair I heard from her, but the determination to get past the hopelessness and start living for herself once again.  I will be sharing stories from three women I know, in their own words, who had to wait for a few years to have children. 

I’ll let you draw your own conclusions. Enjoy.

Wednesday, 7 August 2019

Friend poaching

A friend shared the photo below with me as she was not pleased about a certain friend who would always corner every new friend she introduced and exclude her from activities. I wondered whether the friend made plans with the third parties when she was unavailable for instance but according to her, that was not the case.
On the other hand, I have seen a number of posts where people mention that friendships these days do not seem to have any depth, or how loyalty and integrity seem to be missing.