There Is No One Size Fits All Approach To Stress And Burn Out

Not so long ago, when reference was made to burn out and stress, there was a tendency to think it was something far fetched. Or something that had other forms in which it manifested. However, more people are coming to terms with this and how it is linked to mental health. From my experience, I realised that a good number of people are indeed stressed, burnt out and in dire need of a break. It manifests little by little, our body tells us, then as the signs accumulate, chronic stress manifests and some people never recover from it. At this time, immunity is weakened, which could easily culminate in chronic or terminal illnesses. It creeps on you slowly then spirals out of control.

In the bid to be great at what we do, we sometimes lose ourselves or forget to pay attention to ourselves. Being overworked or stressed these day seems to come with a badge of honour, which makes me wonder why we glorify stress. 

When it gets to the point where we can no longer go on or on those days when it all seems too much, one would like the world to pause for just one minute. But you realise in horror that the world can be cruel and life just seems to go on. One also wonders if some people who are able to stay disconnected from their feelings have a super power. The quick realisation of being dispensable hits differently. From holding it together for so long, it is easy to fall apart. And fall you might, very hard. Through certain kinds of events, you also get to realise which of the people around you you can really rely on. 

Can we get past this?

I think I have just the right person for you. You are smart and beautiful, I wonder why no one has taken you off the market yet. 

Boma was on Vee's case, they had been friends for a long time and she had been married for 15 years, a feat they were currently celebrating. Vee was beautiful and successful but this part of her life had been on a standstill for as long as Boma could remember. Vee was a loyal friend, as she stood there attending to guests, Boma could not help but be grateful for this friend of hers. The anniversary party turned out to be much more fun than they anticipated.

By the end of the day when they all settled down, the ladies did the usual, analysing different scenarios and laughing at some. It was always fun for them. All of a sudden, with a matter of fact look on Boma's face, I meant what I said earlier today she said to Vee. I do know someone I think you might like. Vee was not opposed to being set up, so asked for all the details. 

Visiting Senegal? A few things to do

I visited Senegal last month after 10 years! I didn't remember so much about Dakar from the last time I visited, but the thing that struck me most in 2012 was the Gorée Island (île de Gorée) and I knew I had to go back.

Senegal is a small country in West Africa with a population of about 16 or 17 million. Largely on the coast, a good part of the population speaks Wolof, one of the national languages. Wolof and French are widely spoken.

The baobab tree and the lion are national symbols. While talking about boabab trees, someone made reference to how elders sit under baobab trees in rural areas and disputes get resolved under boabab trees. It obviously holds great significance and there are lots of these trees all over the country.

If you followed the Africa cup of Nations recently, you'll know that the team that won was the Lions of Teranga 😊

A baobab tree

Dakar, the capital of the country, has a nice vibe to it, it has a life of its own and there are lots of things to do. The night life is indeed night, as they start late, close to midnight (depending on the kind of fun you are looking for) and go on till morning. There is a wide range of restaurants, bars and hang out spots with live music. There is a beach area lined with exercise equipment already set up. You'll find people exercising there most times, the area is called La Corniche. 

In Dakar, the art scene is grand, from street art to graffiti, museums and the art village. The traffic is equally hectic so the colourful streets can keep you company while you get through. Have a look at  some of the street art I drove past:

Travelling in Rural Africa

One of the many adventures of living in a remote place is travelling. Since I've been in this line of work, I have appreciated the ease with which I could travel in normal times. Getting from point A to B now takes a lot of planning and consideration. To get out of Uvira, the town I am currently in, I have to travel for 3 hours to another town called Kamanyola, then cross the border to Rwanda to a town called Kamembe.    

Kamembe is a small town that has a national forest of 1020km2. There are two exit/entry points from the Democratic Republic of Congo into South Kivu : 1) Kamanyola, which is around 46km and around 1hour and 15 minutes from Kamembe airport and 2) Bukavu which is 20km from the Kamembe airport and about a 40 minute drive. Typically, I would spend the night in Kamembe then fly to Kigali the following morning. It is a 40 minute flight, but a 5 hour drive to Kigali where I can fly from. This option is more practical for me than going to the capital (Kinshasa) to access the international airport. It is equally a two day trip.

See my previous post about some of my first impressions of the DRC.

Meeting the Democratic Republic of Congo

I got to the airport early to avoid the rush. As I finally settled at the gate that was displayed on the screen, I got busy, killing time. At some point, it didn't seem right. The people at this gate all seemed too calm and quiet. I had 30 minutes before boarding time and decided to check again. I decided not to rely on the information on the screen and asked an airport staff. I was told that I was indeed at the wrong gate.

I rushed to find the right gate and as I approached, I knew these were the people I was looking for! Congolese people are vibrant, kind of like my fellow Nigerians. There were people speaking loudly, some overly dressed, which the Congolese are known for and of course they were disorderly. People had started lining up to make their way to the plane. The flight was smooth, then when the plane touched down, on cue, people started clapping. I did not understand how I felt, but I was actually shocked that so many people were clapping in sync. 

"The Gains of a Fitness Boot Camp"

As the sun sets in Uvira, in eastern Democratic Republic of Congo, a group of colleagues are twisting and stretching in readiness for an hour of physical activity. There is usually between six to nine staff attending this evening exercise routine that happens three times a week. It may not seem like anything out of the ordinary to take time to exercise; but for the staff of this hardship site, taking a moment to release steam in what we termed as ‘the boot camp’ is helping them cope with working under difficult conditions.

Played

It’s A Match…the familiar pop up from the dating app showed on his screen.

He didn’t care so much anymore. He had had several matches, some seemed cool while others were clearly there to grind and move on. It kept him entertained, which he was enjoying.  A few messages came in, this one seemed to know how to hold a conversation. They both were spontaneous and met same day. She was even more beautiful and charming in person. Her photos did not do her justice.

He’d been chatting with another person, they got on really well, but with the strange times in the world, they were yet to meet each other. Video calls, voice calls and chats were all useful thanks to covid, but it was wild that the whole time, 3 birthdays had passed, and she never remembered his birthday. So, for the third year, he erased hers from his memory. With this in mind, he had decided that were he to match with anyone, he would meet in person as soon as possible, then decide if they wanted to remain in touch or move on.