Building Castles

Tony walked to the ATM with such heaviness of heart because he was about to empty his account. Notwithstanding, he went ahead as there was a basic need. As the notes came out, he wondered why he was so broke but then, the year so far had been one full one. Most challenging yet rewarding, the kind of projects he had carried out, he never thought he would. At the same time, he had been broke a few times but this broke? No! The thought terrified him but his comfort was something he heard recently and chose to apply at the moment...’this is the poorest you’ll ever be’. A smile broke out and with satisfaction he got into his car and drove off. Who would see such a good looking lad and know the kind of challenges he could be facing.

The 'home' front

From a distance where I sat, I watched as this child continually threw a tantrum and his mother acted helpless and gave into every whim of her child. All he wanted was to have his way and by simply looking, it was rather obvious that he was a handful. I felt for her but at the same time, whose job is it to instill some discipline in him? Reminded me instantly of another child I saw at a mall who almost gave her mother a heart attack simply because she wouldn’t listen nor stay in one place. That’s almost common pIace right?

 

On the other hand, there was a beautiful girl, dressed like a doll, looking all glamorous…judging from her looks, the first thought could be…”she is so spoilt” but to my surprise she looked right into my face while she passed and greeted. Since she seemed interested in chatting, her mum had a seat and we all had an interesting chat. She would apologize and say thank you at every instance. Her mum had to remind her not to apologize when it isn’t needed. As small as she is, she was so well mannered; her parents have done a fine job so far.

 

The Unknown

From the tender age of their teens, he had his eyes on her…but flee was all she did, his name was one around and hurt she feared.

Years passed same way he would come and go. They both led their lives oblivious of any connection.

Away they both went with the wind but things didn’t work out both ways and back in each others way they were thrust once again.

Plan B she cannot accept to be, she was there the whole time but right past he walked and made a choice.

True he claims to be but slighted is all she feels. Black or white it has to be, shades of gray are not good enough.

Unspoken words, unanswered questions linger but intimidated by her outspoken nature he remains and proper communication eludes them.

Hurt her eventually he did but a future together he wants despite all. Bringing herself to accept that and trust him again she cannot do just yet…Trust has to be earned and that much she expects of him.

Left off trails…hoping to pick up from where it stopped is all he acts out but it won’t work that way for the lass.

Matters of the heart, who can comprehend them?

Could it be love? Love…a word…so many have doubted whether it truly exists. Love is pain but love everyone seeks in some form.

At the least expected time and places, love finds us. Caution thrown to the wind, reckless abandon takes people in love over. Too many times love doesn’t come the way we expect it but love is hardly enough.

Thoughts wandering; is it meant to be?

Our Pride

I had taken being Nigerian for granted all my life. Being at home, there is almost no reason to wear your nationality, that’s all one knows how to be anyway. Growing older and being more in touch with the world, it seems to dawn on people that ‘your nationality is your pride’.

Visiting different countries especially when family and friends live in such places can be very different from living in them; you are made to feel at home and can be shown around easily. There is a tendency to be shielded from some of the experiences that one gets exposed to while living in the Diaspora. See my previous post, 'Tales from the Diaspora'

With this realization, your nationality is either a blessing or a curse – at least so it seems. I noticed that people of any country living abroad tend to be more nationalist than those at home.       

'We' no dey carry last!

Has anyone noticed how easily we Nigerians follow the trend of about anything that happens to be in vogue? Not just that, but the tendency to easily abuse things isn't out of place.... Pardon me if you don't share my view but I happened to grow up in the 80's when the world had some sanity in it.
A quick look at these and you just might share my view ;)

Religion 

The two major religions in Nigeria are Christianity and Islam.
If you were to take a drive around Nigeria, the number of churches and mosques is alarming. The churches, can be found within every few kilometres, and have all sorts of names, one would think it were a competition. Loud speakers calling for prayers from mosques, prayers and singing from churches, talk about noise as an environmental hazard?!
Do not get me wrong, I do not condemn religion but I am sure that even God follows order :-)
I found this survey that was done sometime back (2004), I wonder what the results would be today if it were to be repeated.


 
In graphics:What the world thinks of God What The World Thinks Of God

What pays?

Does it pay to be good anymore? A friend of mine blurted that question out while we were having a conversation. We had a very long conversation about life which touched about everything.

She had gone through some experiences that were making her question all she was taught and believed in.

 

I actually took time to reflect on this question: today does it pay to be good? It seems the good people are the bad ones because they refuse to conform and they end up looking imprudent for their actions. On the other hand, so much evil is perpetrated and it is second to normal to be bad.

In the society, at work places, corruption is so rampant, in the news there are always evil stories making headlines.

This and That ;)

Blazing hot, reflections unbearable to the eyes, that's how hot the sun has been in this part of the world.

Luckily, a thick mast of clouds have begun to gather, black and ready to burst,

nothing withheld, the downpour came...breeze, coolness, lower temperatures, phew!

The sound on the roof, the clean smell everywhere, beautiful green to behold, nature.
Its the rainy season :-)

I have a free Saturday this weekend, yippee!

I literally have my Saturdays dedicated to attending friends’ weddings these days. So many people are getting married. It is a pleasure to witness love expressed by taking the bold step to tie the knot.

On the other hand, I also ask myself every now and then, why are there so many divorces today? 

Marriage as I have understood from when I was a child is an institution that is meant to last for a life time. So what is it people are doing wrong? Many of our parents have stayed together through thick and thin. They didn’t have as much information and opportunities to make their lives as beautiful as ours are today, but they stayed. 

I read somewhere; a young lady asked an old woman how she and her husband managed to stay together for 75 years and the woman said ‘we are from a generation where even when things aren’t going as we want, we fix those things and not walk away’. . . deep! 

Aren’t there times when some things just cannot be fixed? I have heard of a few divorces and some marriages are simply beyond repair. What should such people do?

I have also seen people rush into marriage from pressure from family, society and themselves. Why, is the question I usually ask? Especially when a person puts him/herself under pressure..."all my friends are married, I have to get married too", yeah yeah! It doesn’t happen at the same time for everyone.

Does love even exist some ask but still go ahead to get married to someone they can’t really say they love. Is that right? Love will come I have heard but ermm....

Just last night a friend complained about how terrified she was about getting married, she loves her boyfriend and he has been asking her to marry him but she is holding back, she doesn’t feel like she is ready yet. Can anyone be ready enough for marriage? It’s a lifetime commitment, that’s huge but marriage is a beautiful thing for those who get it right.

Anyway, to all my married friends and those getting married in the near future, hearty cheers go out to you all! Wishing you every good thing that comes with being married.