Twenty first century young adults

Over the last year and a half, I have been volunteering to work with young adults from teenage to early twenties. It has been very interesting, shocking and I have learnt so much.

It has been interesting because I have met some truly driven people who inspire me.

Shocking, at the level of ignorance considering that this generation has everything at their disposal to learn. The effects social media has on these children is saddening as it is mostly negative. The selective reading tilts more to gossip and entertainment but little about things that could help to build them up.

But I have also met some extremely intelligent and super driven ones who impress me each time we speak. I learn from all of them.

Last weekend, the topic we were discussing was 'my big picture'. It was a topic we discussed for a period of time. We took turns, with each person having to talk about their plans and goals, and it was inevitable to present such a topic without giving some practical examples including personal ones. I talked about one goal I hoped to achieve which I have already started working towards.

Sharing pictures

“The ethics of using pictures of people, especially children who don't have the power to decide whether and how their image is used in the press is complex but they must be treated with sensitivity and dignity”…seeing this as a facebook friend’s status accompanied by a naked crying girl, running along with other children in a conflict situation struck a chord deep in me. 

The issue of pictures being taken and published without consent especially with people who might not be able to challenge that action tends to keep getting a reaction from me. A colleague and I were discussing this topic and she mentioned a post that went viral of a fellow European who went to Africa as an aid worker but the person was all about taking selfies in the midst of 'suffering' Africans. That was certainly not the motive for this person being sent to Africa.  In portraying the picture of suffering Africans, how about showing pictures also of the nice places where these selfie crazed people eat, live and hang out…pictures of those places should equally fill the internet, because in the midst of the suffering, these workers find places that remind them somewhat of home where they feel safe.

In Control

Always said to function too efficiently, somewhat robotic with a mild case of obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Meticulously arranging everything, the preference of things aligned and expecting to meet things where they were kept on return.

Each time expectations were not met, things were taken out quite hard on self. The biggest critic/judge but at the same time, the biggest motivator, has been and continues to be self.

The problem with being so strong or in control all the time is that when there is a break down, it is usually bad. They say the ones who appear strongest are usually the ones who are weakest inside.

 

Expectations fell short this time, targets were missed and the self beating was quite hard over that, for a bit too long, for the first time. Catching self then being convinced that it was fine to wallow in a little self pity and be vulnerable. 

Letting go was the beginning of trouble. Never having dealt with this mix of emotions, it was strange and extremely scary to be in that position. Starting to feel needy and expecting some form of validation… 

But from who?!

Photo credit: Google images

A view on the diplomatic/foreign service

Disclaimer – if as a diplomat, you do not have the ability to stomach criticism, please do not read further as you may identify yourself in a behavioural category in this post. If you are comfortable with being criticised please enjoy reading. This post is meant to evoke critical thinking. 

It has been talked about so many times of how diplomats who represent the finest of a country go abroad to serve their governments. The sad part is that some of these individuals happen to show the worst of their countries. I say so because people who have never had any contact with the countries the diplomats represent, could easily take it to be the way majority of the people from that country would behave.

Feminism and relationships

Thanks to Estrella this post is being written. She asked that I write about feminism especially with regards to relationships in the Nigerian context...

 

When I googled feminism, the definition that came up was “the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men.”

Feminism in the context of a relationship…I am not sure how well these two go together but I will say on my part that I believe that both individuals in a relationship are meant to complement each other, the female as well as the male have a role to play. Where one is lacking, the other could make up. This is very vague but that’s my line of thinking for starters.

The notion of one sex being superior to the other has long been a bone of contention for many. I am not writing this to negate or to agree to that notion. Each person can make the choice for herself/himself. As open minded as I would like to think that I am, I could be traditional in some areas. When it comes to a relationship, in terms of marriage/civil partnerships for instance, I still have the notion that a man should be a bread winner, that the man should be the head. The woman could earn more and contribute significantly to running the home, she could even be the one bringing in all that is needed to run the home when there might be a case of the man losing a job or going through a rough time because these things happen but the man should still take the lead. However, certain things are true in a relationship like both sexes need each other.

I write because...

Some wonderful followers of my blog have asked why I have not been consistent with my writing lately. I've been wondering why too, but I think I know...

I have also been asked what the focus of my blog is. I have chosen to be open and not restrict myself to one aspect, at least for now...so I write about everyday struggles and events, things that any and everybody can relate to.

So from my place of inconsistency, which I am trying to jump out of, I am reminding myself why I like to write:
- I write because it is one of the things I love doing
- I write to let someone out there know that other people have the same struggles
- I write to clear my head
- I write because it is one of my major ways of expression
- I write just because...

A friend who reads my blog asked me a month ago to talk about my blog on her radio show this month. I wonder if I should, as I have not written much in the last month.

So I will throw it open to you out there, let's do this together :-)...
Please leave a comment or fill the contact form, almost at the end of the page on the left, with suggestions on what you might like me to write about.

I look forward to reading from you. Thank you again for always coming back even when I am inconsistent.