I once read a piece titled ‘The Writers Curse’. That curse is exactly what controls me right now, I sit here not sure where I am going with what I write but I am compelled to write, and write I will do...
Chinyere and Tobi were best of friends, they had grown up together and despite being girls, they never had 'trouble' living together. These two had to move in with Nkiru, another friend of theirs who was the sweetest person, a doting mother hen as Tobi always teased.
Unnecessary issues as Nkiru called them seemed to come up every day at work. Having a boss who didn’t appreciate a ‘small girl’ (as he liked to say) standing up to him was not the easiest task. He seemed to make extra efforts to find faults in everything she did. Being human, the pressure began to get to her but the mistake she made was bottle it all up.
Suddenly, she noticed that she seemed to be upset at every little thing around her especially at home. She once had the best relationship with Chinyere and Tobi, they all would talk endlessly but things had changed and they avoided her because she took everything out on them. Nkiru came home upset all the time and walking into the house seemed to upset her even more. She didn’t realise how much of an angry bee she had become.
Tobi finally mustered the courage to ask Nkiru why the bad mood had suddenly become a part of her and why her space that had been shared for some time suddenly seemed invaded. Chinyere on the other hand had put up a defense towards Nkiru and their relationship was never to be the same. For the first time in a long time, Nkiru talked honestly, shared her grief and pain...who would have thought that talking could bring such relief!
She was under enormous pressure from work, had just called off a relationship and felt like the whole world had turned against her. She had had the very last nerve in her body pulled and had been wallowing in anger. She realised while talking that she had handled it all wrongly, had accused everyone but herself of being wrong. She had messed up some things that may never be repaired.
She needed to go back to being the sweet person that everyone knew her to be, she needed to be true to herself and put an end to the hurt and anger she was feeling. And so the soul searching began....
Isn’t it always very easy to point an accusing finger at somebody else without examining ourselves? We never know how evil or how bitter we could become over the smallest issues. Sometimes we seek justification even in wrongdoing. As small and irrelevant as this may sound or look, the best place to be is in a happy place. Start by looking at the person you see staring right back at you in the mirror and the world will be a much better place.