The Price to Pay

Biola reflected on the recent events that she had had to deal with. Her life had been upended in a way she never imagined would happen. She thought that she had things figured out until that fateful day. She had been so consumed by her career and getting ahead that she neglected everything else and everyone who was dear to her, until her world came crashing down.

She got home, late as usual. I’m home she called out but emptiness came back at her. She went to her bedroom, something was different, but she couldn’t figure it out immediately. Then she went to give her a son a kiss, something she did every night. But he wasn’t there. Then she noticed, a lot was gone from his room. She ran back to her room and opened the wardrobe. A good lot of her husband’s clothes were gone. She called, frantically, but he didn’t answer his phone. She was in a panic, she wondered why. She saw them in the morning before she left for work and all seemed well. Or so she thought.

Her husband was everything she had hoped for; supportive, loving, manly and he held his own. He had things going for him as well, but drew the line when it came to his family. He poured his all. He never missed any event his son was to attend, he showed up for his wife’s events and she was so proud of him. He hinted at her taking him for granted many times but was one who shied away from confrontation, so he would say his piece then move on. As work got more demanding, there were more late nights and she was grateful to him, as he catered to the home front. 

He had been distant lately and she asked what was wrong. He only repeated what he had said before, that she was never there and took him for granted. He was not the most expressive, so it would end with apologies and some good love making, then things would go back to normal. He was also flying high in his career, that’s how they met. At a work reception. She was always in awe of how he managed to balance it all so effortlessly. He seemed content, but she was hungry and she just wanted more all the time.

She had had a long day, typical manic Monday, and was exhausted. She somehow fell asleep, fully dressed, with her mobile phone in hand. Morning came, her alarm startled her, then she remembered. In that moment a wave of fear, grief and some raw pain she didn’t recognise washed over her and she broke down. The realisation of how she may have destroyed the best part of her life, hit her. She indeed had taken it for granted.

After a good cry and a shower, she took the day off, then set out to find her family. She knew there might be a place her husband would be. It was his safe haven, he went there to clear his head whenever he needed to. After a four-hour drive, she was standing at the front door of this place they called their home away from home. But her keys would not open the door. He had changed the locks. She went around looking through the windows and sure enough she spotted them; her husband, her son and a woman she didn’t know. Her apprehension started to turn to anger. She went back to the front door and hit so hard on it that he came to open it finally.

And there he stood, in his usual collected manner, with a smile on his face, like he had no worries in the world. Hello Biola, he said. Disarmed but determined to know what was going on, she tried to walk past him and go in, but he blocked the way. 'You are not welcome here' he finally said. As she stood wondering who this person was, her son’s voice jerked her out of her thoughts. Mummy she heard, and her husband stepped aside looking so lovingly at both of them, gave them a moment then asked their son to go back inside. ‘I always told you that you took me for granted but you didn’t listen’. She wondered how he could be loving yet distant and cold in the same vein. ‘So you are seeing someone else now’, she finally asked. He told her he was not ready to talk to her and had to get back inside. She knew that her husband could be resolute and sensed this was one of those times. She watched him lock the door in her face. She was too stunned by everything happening and could not react. After standing there for about 15 minutes, she willed herself to leave. She got into the car and drove herself back home in shock.

She could only speak to one person who would not judge her, so she made the call. May was there in no time. With no words, she made some soup and insisted that Biola have some. Then she asked what happened. There was no fight, nothing happened that Biola remembered but here she was, alone and missing her family more than she ever had. She barely even thought about the woman he was with, she just kept blaming herself and asking how she let it all happen.

The thing with May was that she was not one to sugar coat, so she didn’t say anything to help Biola feel better but listened. She acknowledged that Biola played a big part in getting things to this point. May simply asked her how she would fix it and if she wanted to.

Her husband on the other hand was in a difficult situation. He loved his wife and wanted his family to be together, but he knew he had to shake things up and this would be the determining factor of whether their marriage would survive or pack up. He invited his cousin to spend time with him and his son, she was someone he could count on for emotional support. She got him and managed to get him talking about his feelings. He had packed his things up and that of his son, as he was unsure what his next move would be. He would do all he could to save his marriage, but at the same time, if they had to part ways, he would accept that too.

Biola cleared her schedule for the week, knowing more than ever that this was one thing she was determined to fight for. She drove out again the next day, but her husband was still unwilling to speak to her. She asked to hang around and spend some time with their son in the garden. The boy happy to play in his childlike ways, with a short attention span, didn’t realise there was trouble. She wished in that moment she could be a child. As the door shut in her face, she cried from the ache sitting in her chest all the way home. In addition to all she was feeling, she felt humiliated. She had never had to deal with this and did not have the faintest idea of how far she had pushed her husband to treat her this way. He on the other hand just felt drained. He liked the space from her, but at the same time, he ached for her. He knew he would have to express his feelings more and communicate better but he just didn’t know how.

Day three and she was ready for the long drive, but today, she would get in that house by whatever means. Her husband came to answer the door, but today he looked tired. 'I see how unhappy you are from your eyes and I am deeply sorry' she said. Those words disarmed him and he stepped aside motioning for her to come in. 'Can we talk, please,' she asked. He nodded. I’m sorry, was all she had to say. She apologized over and over. Then he spoke, finally, and they talked, deeply, for hours. Something they had stopped doing in their marriage. Then she appeared looking at Biola with so much judgment. Rage was bursting in Biola, but trying to keep her cool, she asked her husband who the lady was. He didn’t say anything and just as they were about to go for each other, he quietly mentioned she was his cousin. The one they had talked about long ago but she never got to meet.

An awkward moment passed between the two women, then laughter between all three. And they all knew in that moment, that they would be fine.

 

 Photo - Google